peppermint thanks mint for the love

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enough. enough. i’ve had enough. of your nonsense. go away. yes. go! i hate you. i hate guys like you. really. i really do. u understand?





April 5, 2009 Posted by | 1 | Leave a comment

life full of shit.

like broken glasses, my heart is now broken. for whatever reason i dont want to know. i just hate you the most now. ‘perasaan benci tu selalu datang dari kasih yang terlampau.’

now i know, the truth. i couldnt face it. and now, terabe-rabe carik Pencipta Yang Maha Esa. how am i going to go through this. tears cant stop dropping.. how dare you. how dare you did that. i just couldnt bear it and asked for a break-up…

i hate you. i hate you. i hate you. i really do. i hate myself for trusting you. i hate myself for loving you, i hate you.

now what am i going to do.?

April 4, 2009 Posted by | 1 | 1 Comment

jauh di mate. dekat di hati. kan?

saye penat sangat lately. keje tk penah sikit. bayang kan, K1, K2, Explorers, Challengers. semue saye handle arabic and malay. tadik tahap kesabaran dah nk sampai tahap maksima. saye pegi masok ofis dan jumpe GURU BESAR. saye blg die. “help me. find another mudarrisah to help me. i cant afford to do this alone, especially when we move to cck later on.”

and well, she understand. but kind of, disappointed. sebab die ingat saye dpt tahan smpi kite pindah ke choa chu kang. sorry lah. but seriously. kalau teaching aje tkpe. filings. markings. updating profiles. parents checklist. bayangkan. byk sgt. kepale saye pon tadi da pusing. muntah due kali di toilet. pening.

mungkin saje saye pon tgh musim rindu merindu.. hah. dah mase2 mcm ni(stress lah konon), tkde sape saye nk mengadu. ok saye ade tuhan. Allah. setiap kali saye mengadu ngn Dia.

tapi ketiadaan strongman saye betol2 membuat saye kesunyian dan kesepian. tu yg saye asyik carik gadoh dlm talipon. sori la… tkd niat nk buat mcm tu. cume. ehem. jauh di mate. masih tetap dekat di hati. jadi saye nk eksyen2 gado2 syg. haha. phm? tk? saye pon mcm tk phm. pening seh!

oh aah. saye ade challenge baru. seorang murid dari iran register due hari lepas. masya Allah. perangai die semcm. dah lebih terok dari midun yg dulu ade dlm buku sastera saye. kalau ikutkn hati, saye pon akan bertindak mcm cikgu nye si midun tu. tapi iman saye maseh kuat. insyaAllah. kepade Tuhan yg saye amat syg, maaf kalau saye asyik mengadu dlm hati kepade Mu. Kau tabahkanlah iman aku menghadapi murid yg…. entah la. tkd social skill langsung. saye dah ditendang dan disepak nye. nasib saye ade babat. kalau tk mungkin tulang saye retak. teacher nafisah sampai MC. hah. terok kn?

bayangkan. die lari2 satu sekola tu. lahh.. nak lari? clementi stadium belakang je. blg lah nk g stadium nk lari. jgn susahkn guru nk kejar, tangkap. dah tu cikgu ditendang. tk mkn saman betol!!!

tkpe2. saye tetap sabar. akan tetapi saye tk bagi chance. saye tulis kt communication book bagi mak die bace. sampai guru MC kau! mungkin saje teacher nafisah da benci si hossein tu! sigh. ape lah saye nk buat ngn die! naseb die K2! sbb K1 saye form teacher. haha! K2 tchr naf. gdluck naf! heh.

dahla. sebenarnye hari ni saye nk luahkn bende lain. keseluruhan entry saye kali ni hanyelah bertujuan utk megadu naseb sbb saye tk dpt nk mengadu kt nun jauh di sane hari ni. talipon bimbit nya rosak. jadi? saye tk dpt la call. kesian kn? nak tahu ape? i miss you k?

bye lah.

April 1, 2009 Posted by | emotion, random | 1 Comment

28th of march

27th march.

i was restless. but due to long working hours i slept right after reaching home. was not in good terms with sm. so i slept around 10plus at night.

0126 hours, 28th march. i woke up and looked at my phone to see what time it was. and surprisingly, its 1:26am in the morning, the exact moment i came out from my mother’s womb for 7 months. the exact moment, 20 years ago. i cant sleep. it was scary. waking up at that time. reached out to the sudoku book ipah gave me last time and purposely tried solving the hard one. and of course, i fell asleep while that. hah.

bro woke me up in the morning and mum wished me first. i thanked her and dad asked me, “nari nk blanje mkn eh?”

well i dont have much. so i keep quiet. went to work. colleagues dont even know its my birthday, coz i want this year to be a low profile birthday. 20 seh. so kept mum till work ends and went back to ayu’s place. as soon as i open the door, ayu sang me a birthday song which well, rather embarassing coz i am 20 but i greatly appreciated it. soon, we decided to catch a movie and off we go to vivo city.

the queue was very long so i brave up and asked a group of juniors from irsyad to buy for me 3 tickets for ‘coming soon’. well, tk tahu malu lah kate kn. so yeah.which after that the tickets were sold out. see? hah. (and the next show is at night, 9:55pm. sape yg nk tgk)

we lied to mum that its a funny story but we told her the truth after we ate at banquet. and she freaked out. hah. we kinda dragged her into the cinema. heh. and so, she went. it was quite scary, though i find most of the parts hilarious. unexpected some times. but i dont know if it was worth my $30.

oh and and, before we ate, mum asked ayu about mp3 and asked me whether i want like hers. and of course, i smiled widely and said yes i want. hahha. so i got a bday prezzie,. samsung s3 music player. cool. its pink in colour. i like i like!!!!

then after movie we fetched ayu’s mum at dover and off to al-azhar eating place for our dinner. i had fish and chips. okla. 6/10. worth if you are really hungry but dont ever dare to order it if you have had your late lunch before that.

and after that, we went home…..

a rather low-profile birthday this year. but its great when i spent it with my loved ones. and sm, you owe me a bday present k. yeah i know u bought it like last 2 weeks already but i have not seen it so that means you owe me one. haahha. and have i told u this? that i love you. hee.

and of course, i love my dearest family. every second spent is very meaningful.

thank You Allah for everything. =)

Happy 20th birthday to me.

March 29, 2009 Posted by | 1 | Leave a comment

busy lah ehk.

salam to all….

oh i so miss blogging like hell. ok i dun have time actually but since i dun really in my mood to do my research, i start blogging first.

work has been, tiring. and hard. and complicated. and stressful. and full of tension. and all la. ironically, i am excited to come back to work tomorrow. why? oh of course, my arienah n haqimi are the magnetic object in the school.hah. well well. i have so much burden on me. i am alone now. i am the only mudarrisah there. and i have to be in-charge of everything related to arabic and malay.(all the ECs, K1s and K2s.)(and of course, all the exhibition needs to be translated to arabic and malay since they now have a mudarrisah here-me)

see? and they dont pity me at all. i am not even a month old there. and yesterday i received a msg.

‘hello. i need u to look into our mind map and outline for the september fun blazing lessons and activities. do some moral education. attach relevance to hadith. by monday.’

upon reading, i swore like hell. wth kn? what the hell is fun blazing? what the hell are lessons and activities on september? what the hell is ‘some’ moral education? attach what relevance to hadith? and WHAT? monday??????????

or maybe they forgot. i come to work only since 9 march. before that, no, i did not attend your previous meetings to know what the hell are u talking about in the sms. geram sehhhhhhhhhhh.

k fine. super angry. but well, die die must do something what… i wont give up so easily lah.. heh.

and and. my superman is flying back here in april the 20. yey! my StrongMan. SM. yey yey yey.

oh by the way. i went to practical just now after a month plus not driving. so awkward,. but the instructor said he was glad that i dun forget things like lane discipline because he expected me to forget that, and didnt expect me to remember those circuit coursess…… heh. to be frank, i just shoot. lol.

okla. need to do my research now. bye people. wish me luck.

March 22, 2009 Posted by | 1 | Leave a comment

a week after…

salams to all…

a week of training at the west coast centre is very tiring. but, very fun. i just am thankful that west coast’s not much in terms of number of kids overall. we have only around 30 students. so.. yeah. thankful enough that i come onboard.

anyways, i wont be lucky in 3 months time. during june holidays, we’ll be shipping out to choa chu kang. so no more west coast branch. and we are expecting more kids. i really am not sure how to handle crowds. hah. kindergarten is ok, i guess. what bothers me is the explorers and challengers-we call them EC. ergh.

speaking of ECs, i am reminded of haqimi. the afternoon session superstar. he is only 2 yrs old. he can recite alfatihah. he can write his own name. he can recite annas, alikhlas, even to alkauthar. but he always come late. so i asked him.

me: u ah, always come late. u think u are a superstar ek?

haqimi: no!!! i am not superstar! i am superman!

and of course, i burst out loud when hearing that from him spontaneously. funny lah seh!! the fact that he is only 2 yrs old mind you!!!

anyways, of course, as you can see now, i love kids. especially boys. lol. they are so adorable……

ok2. seriously, i have yet to decide where to go after getting my a results. i thought of retaking but now, i think its impossible for me to study for it coz even when i am in school, i am such a lazy bum hah. i thought of applying SIM or any local unis here. but i think i am not ready for uni level. there are many things to be considered. to be brushed on. i am considering courses in kaplan. its a private institution offering from diplomas, to bachelors, masters and even doctoral. so i thought of taking some diploma. which i really am considering right now is the human resource management or financial management. something like that. maybe. so yeah. hopefully, i think it over fast and hopefully the fees are ehem… are reasonable. 10months of studying and then exams. good one i suppose. oh, and, its a part-time one u noe. so yeah.

well well. sm is still in his homeland and of course, without him here i dont hang out anywhere after work. even my sunday(today) was spent at home. i am bored to death so to you my dear, please come back now or else i die out of boredom here! grr.

and and. dad’s birthday is coming pretty soon. 17th march. and of course, mine is too! haha. so people, dont forget my birthday k?? nothing much la u can buy for me. just get sm here by my side and i am very touched already! hahahaha. buy for me a flight ticket from kuching to singapore just for sm to be here by 28th march?????? *winks*

haha. ok thats all for now. maybe i’ll post pictures in my next post.

and oh gosh. i cant have my ‘school holidays’ tomorrow as well as friday. have to come back to school to finish the unfinished work and send it to teacher liti by friday. ergh. lucky i dont have much marking to do. haha.

ok bye ppl. take care!

March 15, 2009 Posted by | 1 | Leave a comment

while you were there.i wish you were here.

salams all.

i am seriously overloaded with work. only 3 days at work and works are piling up. since the previous 2 who were in my position were soooooooooooo ngjrnguvnuigh. haha. so i have to cover everything back. back to square one la kn.

so if you are still confused where am i working. ok i’ll tell. Hanis Montessori Kindergarten. i am now a mudarrisah zuliana. hah. and will be taking diploma in montessori. but well, i am not sure if i am able to commit that much because i want to apply SIM and UM. so…. yeah, we’ll see how it goes…

anyways, teaching is tough la. but the students are very cute. lol. montessori kindergarten is very different from normal kindergartens u c.. here, we have montessori session. very different. while i teach at Hijrah Kindergarten, it was very typical type of singing, rhyming, worksheets and etc. but here, we have exploring and challenging. ok i dont know how to explain.

so tomorrow will be my ‘first day’ without a trainer. so…. wish me luck!

oh anyways, handphone will be in silent mode or switch off because i want to focus teaching. heh.


sm is still in kampong and i am damn bored to the max without him here. without his screaming when i eat choclolates, without his irritating laugh, without our everyday quarrelling, without his annoying funny faces, without him telling me stories(though i doubt about some of the facts haha), without him insisting on meeting everyday, without watching him eat, without his anger when i scream or shout or talk back at him…. without….. him… here by my side………..

i miss you…….. please come back? i know you will………

ok thats all. need to email to head tchr something now. bye for now.

*oh btw, TP test is coming like soon soon soon.!!!

*i miss you very very very very much!

March 11, 2009 Posted by | 1 | 1 Comment

scarier than scary

salams to all.

i had a very bad day. well, not because of my results you see.

ok2. A levels? i hoped nobody felt disappointed with me. because i already told my parents, not to hope too much this time round.

before taking the results, while changing, (i was from work). i didnt feel any nervous or whatever. and so, i told my mum about it. i felt sad plus worry plus disappointed coz sm is going back. so results thingy was my last on the list to worry. haha.

while i was on the way to school. called sm.

me: takot arh.. tadi tk rase pape pon. skg mcm dah konfem fail sume..

sm: tk perlu risau. konfem pass. mcm baru je kenal ayang.

me: diam arh. sume ckp gitu.

and then, when i reached school, hasanah told me everyone was crying outside the office. i was brave enough to get my results from the admin and out from the office as soon as possible. i didnt take a look at it till kay asked how was it. and they persuaded me to look at it. and then….

me: ape grade yg pass ah?

them: ABCDE

me: oh. k.

i was very nervous then. coz yes. miracles do happen. i passed. except for islamic law which i obtained an ‘O’ grade. which means i failed in advance level but pass in ordinary level. so.. yah. and i passed GP. oh my malay sux. and arabic was,… whatever too. but i wont dwell so much coz, i dont study anyway. dont believe me? ask sm. i met him almost everyday during the a levels period. and before and after exams. so yeah. above everything, i want to thank Allah for giving me this faith that miracles do happen. and for making miracles happened for me. ok the results was very very bad. but come to think of it.  I DID NOT STUDY u c? so yeah. haha. not boasting. i simply dont know what to say with myself. ‘if i studied…….’

wallahu a’lam.

anyways. i met sm for the last time. it was scary. passed all the things i bought for him and people back in kampong. i had mixed feelings. he promised he’ll come back mid or end of april. i’ll hold on. i’ll wait for you. i keep my promise. i’ll wait. but u have to keep your promise too. u’ll come back.

and so. of course. like a typical girlfriend. i cried. badly. so bad of me. he’s not going to marry someone else kan. he’s going back to meet his mum. dad. families. or dear heart. please. let him go for some time. k?

scary. i hate dealing with feelings.

March 6, 2009 Posted by | 1 | Leave a comment


hai everyone.
seems like a decade ago i last typed out here. eheh.
well, worked hard man.

my life has been good and bad of course. good thing is, i managed to earn some pocket money and tried not to burden my mum. secondly, starting from 9 march 2009, i will work permanently as a… heh. cant tell yet for those who dont know. hehehe. thirdly, personal love life has been verrryy good and surprisingly more secured. eheh.
the bad thing is, sm is going back. shooooooootttttttttt! like damn sad lah seh. and i dont know for how long he will be there. he’s homesick lah. but seriously, i cried just now coz it will be my last time seeing him coz i cant see him off at airport because of my stupid planning. gr. gr. gr.
and the thing is, he wont be here with me, during our favourite days which is the march school holidays, AND, MY 20TH BIRTHDAY.
abg……. tkyah balek ah????????????

tomorrow is A-LEVELS result. can u imagine that? and to think i worry other things more than the results is scarier. so scary.

ok now i have to go.
seems i have lost my blogging skills.
bye for now.

March 5, 2009 Posted by | 1 | Leave a comment

ni entry ke bukan?

salam everyone.

i am so sorry if i didnt reply to any of your messages or calls. hp prepaid was low and, even if its  not low, it is not with me now. so yeah.

and , i am busy these days. ahaha. work since monday.

and i am really sorry to madr irsyad (miss amnah and ustazah rohana) if i didnt reply or what for the relief teaching. fact is, my hp is not with me now. CT! if you are reading this, do tell them about it k. thanx yar.

grr. i am so tired. bored.

whats life mann???

i miss my own slacking life. ahaha. so much la. gee.

oh and, been eyeing sony ericson c905 since it came out. oh pleassshhhh!!! anyone? nk belikan? advance bday prezzie???

oh and. cant wait for tomorrow. yey. hehehehe. syaz bday celebration.

aku ni blog ke tk ehk. hehe.

k bye. will be back when i am free.

February 26, 2009 Posted by | 1 | Leave a comment